The Sum of the Parts Equal the Whole
The Sum of the Parts Equal the Whole
I just spent the better part of the last three days goal setting for 2011. Sound familiar? Not sure about you, but I go through this painful exercise every year, and the endeavor is typically laced with trepidation. But this year was different; I think it just means more to me now and I planned for several weeks on giving this process the attention that it really deserves. I was aided by a very detailed and organized goal setting plan that I received from a colleague. This goal setting plan proved to be invaluable as it kept me aligned with exactly what I was trying to achieve. While I was plotting through the goal setting exercise it dawned on me that I was (we are) embarking upon an entirely new decade. That is, of course, if you start your decade’s correctly at the number one. In this case, the ten years starting with 2011 and ending with 2020. I should stop here, just for a moment of clarity for myself, and share some honesty with you from last year. I had similar thoughts about the new decade, last year (2010), and laid down some very hefty goals for myself. I wrote down daily, weekly, and yearly goals. Interestingly enough, I did not set any new decade goals, which is why I have chosen to give myself a “mulligan” this year. For those you “non-golfers”, a mulligan is sort of a do-over. Not really within the rules of golf, but totally acceptable among amateurs, especially on the first tee. Another reason for my fresh start is that I was kind of disappointed with my results for 2010. But after a careful evaluation I didn’t feel quite as bad, as I accomplished a few major milestones last year. For example, one of my goals was to get my book, My Back Nine, published. I am currently awaiting the final copies in the mail, and the book will be available soon. More to follow on that topic. A shameless plug perhaps!! There were other intangible goals that I made progress on, and a few glaring tangible goals that I missed entirely. That’s OK, they made it back on the list, and they will remain until they get tackled. Again, I’m sure some of this has a familiar tone.
While I was contemplating my goals it occurred to me that this new decade presented an excellent opportunity for me to build the framework for my decade goals, and even my life goals. Although I have done some extensive work in recent years diving into my creative right brain, my left brain analytical side usually kicks in when I am attempting to reach a target or goal. In this case, it was the process of clearly defining my short term and long term goals. Using the next ten years as the framework seemed to fuel some hidden desire within to finally do this right. What I mean by that is that I have set goals before, many times. However, I really never gave it the time and energy that the process deserved. In order for us to actually live in the present, stay in and honor each moment, and enjoy life...don’t we need goals? Don’t we need a plan? Without clearly identifying what’s important to us, how can we truly uncover our path that leads to our purpose? Something to ponder….right?
These over-arching goals and principles become the components that help define our lives. May Sarton so famously quoted:
“One does not ‘find oneself’ by pursuing one’s self, but on the contrary by pursuing something else and learning through discipline or routine…..who one is and wants to be”
These words are so encouraging, especially as we attempt to align our decade goals with our own journey and our own life’s purpose. For those of you who may have difficulty defining your goals, you may want to start with these questions:
What is important to you?
What is your life’s purpose?
Where/How do you derive contentment and fulfillment in your life?
What would you like said of you when you are gone?
For example, I heard the great Notre Dame Coach, Lou Holtz; speak at a conference several years back. The topic of his discussion centered on the meaning of life and the legacy you leave behind when you are gone. Here’s what he said:
“I don’t think about the wins and losses these days, so I hope no one remembers them when they think of me after I’m gone. I want the great games to be remembered for the players who played in them, not the short, skinny man who paced the sidelines. I don’t want to be known for the successes I had as a coach, or as a public speaker, because success dies. Significance – helping others to better their lives through word and deed – lasts forever. The only thing I hope is that when I die, someone says, that Lou Holtz was significant to a lot of people. It is the best thing that can be said of a person. I hope it will be said of me.”
You see, if you start here and define what you want to leave behind, than you can go back on try and align your yearly goals, your decade goals, and ultimately...your life’s goals. From there, you can devise a game plan to achieve these goals. It’s not good enough to just write a bunch of things down on paper without a detailed game plan on how you plan on reaching your goals. There are many goal setting mechanisms in place that you can use to assist you in this process. Just go online, go to a book store, or call me if you like. I would be happy to share. This is actually the last piece of your three headed frame for your decade goal setting:
1 – The new decade – Very cool indeed.
2 – Define your life purpose, your legacy, and what you want to leave behind. Perhaps, what you like to have written on your tombstone.
3 – A goal setting program – The process will be difficult without this.
As I look upon my 2010 goals, like I said, at first I was disappointed. But then I considered the fact that I now give this process so much more respect than I used to. This, in turn, tells me that I am on the right path. That I know what I want and that I know I will stay focused on the activities that will lead me to my goals. Will it be perfect? Never. Not a chance. I think that’s where many folks just stop and give up. I was certainly part of that crowd a few years ago. I must admit, I truly believe that if I had gone through this goal setting process with more determination and focus in the past, I would not have put myself in such a deep hole. Sure, on the surface, I seemed to say and do the right things. I even was fortunate enough to enjoy a great deal of success. There are multitudes of reasons why that success didn’t stick, but I am totally confident that my lack of proper goal setting was a large contributer.
Even when I did set goals, they were not consistent with my life’s path and purpose. Why? Perhaps it was because I really wasn’t sure what that looked like. If that is you, than clearly that’s the first step.
They say that the sum of the parts equal the whole. What a fantastic concept to stay targeted on as you endeavor to set goals for this decade. How many times do we get to do this? Seven, maybe eight, nine if we are totally healthy and lucky enough to live until we are ninety. Another item to consider. Check your pulse, your age, and try and identify if you were ever at a better moment in your life than...right now...to be prepared to set the course for this next decade. Perhaps the “decade that defines your life?” A little corny maybe, but it has a nice ring to me. I’m the type of person that will use anything at my disposal to improve my life. If it makes me: A better father, A better friend, A better family member, A better business college, A better boss, A better Christian, or even A better golfer (just kidding!!)….then it’s totally worth it.
In closing I would encourage you NOT to stress over this yearly exercise. If you’re not ready, then come back to it when you are. If you do it only half way, you will not be fulfilled and will get discouraged (like I was) regarding the whole New Year’s Resolution/Goal Setting process. My only suggestion is that if you take a different approach this year, it may just yield the positive results that will help define your life.
Happy New Decade!!
“I believe fervently in our species and have no patience with the current fashion of running down the human being as a useful part of nature. On the contrary, we are a spectacular, splendid manifestation of life” - Lewis Thomas, M.D.
I just spent the better part of the last three days goal setting for 2011. Sound familiar? Not sure about you, but I go through this painful exercise every year, and the endeavor is typically laced with trepidation. But this year was different; I think it just means more to me now and I planned for several weeks on giving this process the attention that it really deserves. I was aided by a very detailed and organized goal setting plan that I received from a colleague. This goal setting plan proved to be invaluable as it kept me aligned with exactly what I was trying to achieve. While I was plotting through the goal setting exercise it dawned on me that I was (we are) embarking upon an entirely new decade. That is, of course, if you start your decade’s correctly at the number one. In this case, the ten years starting with 2011 and ending with 2020. I should stop here, just for a moment of clarity for myself, and share some honesty with you from last year. I had similar thoughts about the new decade, last year (2010), and laid down some very hefty goals for myself. I wrote down daily, weekly, and yearly goals. Interestingly enough, I did not set any new decade goals, which is why I have chosen to give myself a “mulligan” this year. For those you “non-golfers”, a mulligan is sort of a do-over. Not really within the rules of golf, but totally acceptable among amateurs, especially on the first tee. Another reason for my fresh start is that I was kind of disappointed with my results for 2010. But after a careful evaluation I didn’t feel quite as bad, as I accomplished a few major milestones last year. For example, one of my goals was to get my book, My Back Nine, published. I am currently awaiting the final copies in the mail, and the book will be available soon. More to follow on that topic. A shameless plug perhaps!! There were other intangible goals that I made progress on, and a few glaring tangible goals that I missed entirely. That’s OK, they made it back on the list, and they will remain until they get tackled. Again, I’m sure some of this has a familiar tone.
While I was contemplating my goals it occurred to me that this new decade presented an excellent opportunity for me to build the framework for my decade goals, and even my life goals. Although I have done some extensive work in recent years diving into my creative right brain, my left brain analytical side usually kicks in when I am attempting to reach a target or goal. In this case, it was the process of clearly defining my short term and long term goals. Using the next ten years as the framework seemed to fuel some hidden desire within to finally do this right. What I mean by that is that I have set goals before, many times. However, I really never gave it the time and energy that the process deserved. In order for us to actually live in the present, stay in and honor each moment, and enjoy life...don’t we need goals? Don’t we need a plan? Without clearly identifying what’s important to us, how can we truly uncover our path that leads to our purpose? Something to ponder….right?
These over-arching goals and principles become the components that help define our lives. May Sarton so famously quoted:
“One does not ‘find oneself’ by pursuing one’s self, but on the contrary by pursuing something else and learning through discipline or routine…..who one is and wants to be”
These words are so encouraging, especially as we attempt to align our decade goals with our own journey and our own life’s purpose. For those of you who may have difficulty defining your goals, you may want to start with these questions:
What is important to you?
What is your life’s purpose?
Where/How do you derive contentment and fulfillment in your life?
What would you like said of you when you are gone?
For example, I heard the great Notre Dame Coach, Lou Holtz; speak at a conference several years back. The topic of his discussion centered on the meaning of life and the legacy you leave behind when you are gone. Here’s what he said:
“I don’t think about the wins and losses these days, so I hope no one remembers them when they think of me after I’m gone. I want the great games to be remembered for the players who played in them, not the short, skinny man who paced the sidelines. I don’t want to be known for the successes I had as a coach, or as a public speaker, because success dies. Significance – helping others to better their lives through word and deed – lasts forever. The only thing I hope is that when I die, someone says, that Lou Holtz was significant to a lot of people. It is the best thing that can be said of a person. I hope it will be said of me.”
You see, if you start here and define what you want to leave behind, than you can go back on try and align your yearly goals, your decade goals, and ultimately...your life’s goals. From there, you can devise a game plan to achieve these goals. It’s not good enough to just write a bunch of things down on paper without a detailed game plan on how you plan on reaching your goals. There are many goal setting mechanisms in place that you can use to assist you in this process. Just go online, go to a book store, or call me if you like. I would be happy to share. This is actually the last piece of your three headed frame for your decade goal setting:
1 – The new decade – Very cool indeed.
2 – Define your life purpose, your legacy, and what you want to leave behind. Perhaps, what you like to have written on your tombstone.
3 – A goal setting program – The process will be difficult without this.
As I look upon my 2010 goals, like I said, at first I was disappointed. But then I considered the fact that I now give this process so much more respect than I used to. This, in turn, tells me that I am on the right path. That I know what I want and that I know I will stay focused on the activities that will lead me to my goals. Will it be perfect? Never. Not a chance. I think that’s where many folks just stop and give up. I was certainly part of that crowd a few years ago. I must admit, I truly believe that if I had gone through this goal setting process with more determination and focus in the past, I would not have put myself in such a deep hole. Sure, on the surface, I seemed to say and do the right things. I even was fortunate enough to enjoy a great deal of success. There are multitudes of reasons why that success didn’t stick, but I am totally confident that my lack of proper goal setting was a large contributer.
Even when I did set goals, they were not consistent with my life’s path and purpose. Why? Perhaps it was because I really wasn’t sure what that looked like. If that is you, than clearly that’s the first step.
They say that the sum of the parts equal the whole. What a fantastic concept to stay targeted on as you endeavor to set goals for this decade. How many times do we get to do this? Seven, maybe eight, nine if we are totally healthy and lucky enough to live until we are ninety. Another item to consider. Check your pulse, your age, and try and identify if you were ever at a better moment in your life than...right now...to be prepared to set the course for this next decade. Perhaps the “decade that defines your life?” A little corny maybe, but it has a nice ring to me. I’m the type of person that will use anything at my disposal to improve my life. If it makes me: A better father, A better friend, A better family member, A better business college, A better boss, A better Christian, or even A better golfer (just kidding!!)….then it’s totally worth it.
In closing I would encourage you NOT to stress over this yearly exercise. If you’re not ready, then come back to it when you are. If you do it only half way, you will not be fulfilled and will get discouraged (like I was) regarding the whole New Year’s Resolution/Goal Setting process. My only suggestion is that if you take a different approach this year, it may just yield the positive results that will help define your life.
Happy New Decade!!
“I believe fervently in our species and have no patience with the current fashion of running down the human being as a useful part of nature. On the contrary, we are a spectacular, splendid manifestation of life” - Lewis Thomas, M.D.
As always, I love to read your postings. Can't wait to see My Back Nine finished and in print. I know that it has been a labor of love and reflection and can't wait to see you on Oprah and the book circuit. I'll be first in line for an autographed copy. Hugs to you and all of the kids. Loved seeing pictures and how much they have grown. Take care of yourself and keep the reflections on life coming.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Tony. Really enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteGreat blog - definitely inspires thought. Significance :) That is the goal.
ReplyDeleteWhen you spoke of living in the present it reminded me of words a friend once said: "Live in the moment and don't keep score."
I wrote a blog about it over the summer:
http://dozenroses13.com/wordpress/2010/06/23/live-in-the-moment-and-dont-keep-score/
Happy New Decade!!